The shittiest advice ever

*I would like to apologize in advance for the vast quantities of foul language that I forsee in this post. I'm not going to bother censoring out my swear words like I do most of the time. So if you are easily offended by cussing, this is probably not the post for you*

OK! Today I stumbled upon a site for military wives about how to survive deployment. After reading for a few minutes I was just flabbergasted by how completely unrealisitc and BS the entire thing was. It was, quite possibly, the worst advice I have ever heard (with the exception of #1).

1. Allow yourself to feel bad. DONE!

2. Talk to your soldier.
What? I wasn't aware that communication was like an on demand movie. That I could just simply "talk" to my husband, whenever I wanted to. Geez. I wonder what I'm missing here, these past 2 weeks that I have been living without hearing so much as a peep from the other side of the globe...

3. Put a support our troops sticker on your car or wear a pin.
Yes, of course. Because supporting the yellow car magnet industry is going to make ME feel better about my life. Who knew a sticker held that much power.

4. Be positive at all times. Fuck that.

5. Keep busy.
 Fuck that too...I've been "busy" this whole week and all it's done is land me in the ER with even more of a stress ulcer than I already had.

6. Live your life.
 OMG, NO WAY! Here I thought I was supposed to live someone else's life!

7. Don't worry.
*snork!* Easier said than done. I could walk around all day telling people to simply "not worry", but you know that inside I'm freaking out.

8. Don't get frustrated.
FUCKITY FUCK FUCK FUCK!

If you can't tell, this week is going horribly. I've already been in the ER once...contemplating going back. Last night I was drifting off to sleep when I suddenly started shaking. My heart was racing, my head was throbbing, my stomach was growling/intense hunger pains. Basically, I was having a low blood sugar episode. I've had them before, it's not really a big deal. So I went and ate some food. Well, I actually ate quite a bit of food, some complex carbs, soluble fiber, and an orange.

The pain seemed to subside so I crawled back into bed. 10 minutes later it came back. Now that is unheard of. Usually when someone eats something like 500 calories, they don't feel like they're going to die of starvation 10 minutes later.

So I went to the ER, where it was determined that I had low blood sugar and I was equiped with IV glucose and some other random fluids and sent home. I still had to work today, because the training is mandatory or else I forfeit the job.

All day today I have been battling the same hunger pains and problems I had last night. I ate a ton of food this morning and afternoon and no matter what I do I feel like I'm about to pass out from starvation. I have to work yet again tomorrow. So it's now 11:30 pm and I am SO FREAKING HUNGRY! I just ate another 4 hot pockets and feel like I'm going to throw up if I eat any more food, but my stomach is literally doing somersaults growling on itself and my head is pounding. I can't sleep I'm so hungry, but I can't eat.

I'm almost wondering if it's some sort of stress ulcer?

And then to top it off, I feel completely and utterly lonely right now/abandoned. I haven't heard from DH in 2 weeks, so it's not like I can just unload my problems on him, and tell him how I can't even function on a day to day basis anymore. I can't even really explain it...it's like my longing to be cuddled and hugged and stuff is like killing me. The emotional pain is SOOO intense that it's becoming actual physical pain